There has been a rise in mommy bosses around the world over the last five years as we’re seeing mothers find the balance between having children and chasing their desires. Women like Angela Simmons, Cardi B, Beyonce, Kelly Rowland, Ciara, and so many more are doing life on their own terms. Even so, being a mommy boss can be very difficult and time consuming. You can find yourself in a place of stress, anxiety, or burn out. We put together a few tips on how to survive in the world of motherhood and bossdom.
Do What You Want
This is a hard one for us. It’s hard for us to make decisions based on what we actually want because we feel as if we have to do what everyone else wants. But we don’t. We can have our cake and eat it too. We may have to put our foot down a few times and scurry out the door quickly before the kids catch us; but we can make it happen – whatever it is.
Find Your Happy Place
Make a mental or literal list of things you love and visit them often. Whether you do it intentionally or instinctively, visit the things and places that give you peace. These happy places can be literal or figurative. You can join a group or club that makes you happy, set up a friend meetup once a week, or simply sit in your room and listen to music. Meditation, the beach, blowing bubbles, solo movie dates; whatever it is, go and go often.
Prepare In Advance
This one is my favorite. Preparing ahead of time saves you headaches, hassle and time. Whether it’s getting the kids’ clothes out at night or meal prepping on Sunday, getting things organized and ready ahead of time gives you space to be sane in the midst of otherwise stressful moments. It may take a while to create a rhythm and habit that works but you’ll feel better once you get it going.
Create your own space
One thing you realize as you get deeper and deeper into motherhood is that you often lack privacy and space to yourself. You have to create either literal or figurative space in your home and life that will help you get away and spend time with yourself. If you have extra rooms in your home, you’re able to create a “she cave”. If not, use your closet or bathroom as an oasis for yourself. If neither or those are possible, you can create space for yourself in a club or group where you can relate to others. Having a community that is specific to your needs or interests gives you a place to call your own, away from the kids.
We love you mommy bosses but we’re not all good at this one. Rest is one of the most effective solutions to fatigue yet one of the least engaged. Sometimes you need to literally stop what you’re doing and take a few breaths. We use the hours at night to get things done even when we’re exhausted. Create boundaries for your work and yourself by going to bed at a certain time or scheduling a few hours during the week to do absolutely nothing.
Find An Outlet
Releasing your stress, anxiety, or just energy is just what you need to keep it going. From taking strategic breaths to journaling, you need to find a way to let go of the day! You can Journal, Paint, Color, Dance in the mirror, or any of the above until you feel at peace! If you’re having trouble figuring out what that thing is, try going back to the things you used to love when life was a little more simple.
Sometimes we get into the habit of doing what doesn’t matter. Cleaning up the entire house before bed because it’ll make us feel better. Well, I submit that we should just leave it dirty if we’re tired. Or fold the laundry another day. Yes, it gets annoying to watch it pile up, but if you can get by another day without it, leave it alone and prioritize what actually needs to happen.
A few weeks ago, I needed to get a few things done and I was swamped. I had a few little things on my list and decided to delegate them to my husband to get done instead. Yes, I had to give him specific instructions but I was able to cross them off of my to-do list and save time simultaneously. We don’t often delegate because we aren’t sure if the other person can do what we need them to do, the way we can. But we won’t ever get things off of our plates unless we take the first step and trust!
Give yourself grace!
When it is all said and done, there is only so much you can do in the 24 hours you get every single day. Give yourself a little space to be tired, to fail, to forget, to not meet your goals because you are human and you are not perfect. You may not get it right every single time but you should always remember to congratulate yourself for being where you are! You are worthy and no amount of tasks, sales, or accomplishments will change that.